Things We Tell The Girl to Keep Monsters Away

  • That’s why we painted your bedroom pink. Monsters hate pink.
  • Monsters don’t want to eat us. We taste awful.
  • When we bought the new house, we told the Realtor we wanted to live in a no-monster neighbourhood.
  • Monsters won’t come into your bedroom. Monsters are lazy and don’t like climbing stairs.
  • Monsters can’t come down chimneys because the people who make chimneys know how to make them to keep monsters out, but let Santa in.
  • Mom and Dad’s protect their kids from Monsters. That’s one of our jobs.
  • Bad monsters don’t like coming into houses with love in them. Bad monsters don’t like love.
  • Maybe the monsters are lonely? Maybe they want to be your friend?

In addition, we hung some nazar (blue eye) amulets we got when we traveled in Turkey a few years ago. We told he that those were designed to keep away monsters. So far, no monsters, so everything looks like it is working as it should.

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