Tag Archives: Silly

Toddler Accidentally Shoots His Dad

Toddler Accidentally Shoots His Dad. Apparently the 4 year old was pissed that his Dad served him his milk in a green sippy cup and not an orange sippy cup.

The Top 8 Signs Jesus Was a Dad

You may have heard that James Cameron (of Titanic fame) claims to have discovered the lost tomb of Jesus, and that one of the caskets even bears the title, “Judah, son of Jesus,” hinting that Jesus may have had a son.

With that context in mind, List Dad over at Top Five Parenting has come up with the top 8 signs that Jesus was a Dad. A nice chuckle to kickoff the weekend.

How to scare the crap out of your kids

Scaryclown

In the middle of the night sneak into their room and plop this puppy on their nightside table.

My wife found this on a local buy and sell site. I cannot believe that the people who are selling this monstrosity describe it as a “cute bean bag clown with fuzzy hair”. Yeah, cute like a knife wielding psychopathic Stephen King character.

If only it were this easy…

After waiting my entire life for it, the science fiction promises of a wonderful world where food comes in pills and happiness is dispensed in a refreshing mist spray are finally coming true!

When you’re just about at the end of your rope, spritz yourself a dose of California Baby Mommy and Daddy Overtired and Cranky Spray mood lifter and breathe a sigh of relief as the tension dissipates.

Hmmmm, wonder if it’s strong enough to wind down a three year old? Maybe I’ll try spraying it in the cats face first to see if it calms him down.

Things you miss when you are at work

Dad enters the home, tired after a long, hard week at work.

Enter The Girl, bouncing into Dad’s arms, obviously feeling better after being up all night with croup. “Dad! I watched a show today called The Backyardigans and they went into the backyard and had and adventure and they had to look out for booby catchers!”

Dad tosses confused look at Mom.

“Booby traps.”

Oh.

Scared (or should that be scarred) by Santa?

Santa freaks the hell outta the kidsI know it is a bit past the holiday season (and with the credit card bills coming in, the last thing you probably want to be is reminded of Christmas), but I couldn’t resist linking to this photo gallery called Scared of Santa.

Judging from the look of some of those Santa’s, I think the kids have every right to be freaked out. For example, this one clearly does not spend the Santa off season in the Bahamas. Then there’s Man, I Had a Bit Too Much Eggnog Santa, Fugitive Santa, and I Don’t Know What The Hell It Is, But Please Make It Stop Looking At Me Santa.

Thanks to The Tiny Revolution for the lead!

Youthful Tendency Disorder

Ah, thank goodness for The Onion, that online bastion of satire without whom we would never find out about a new, horrible disease striking kids all across the US: YTD or Youthful Tendency Disorder.

Continue reading

We Have a Root!

Things my 3 year old says that crack me up. I think this probably speaks more to my level of maturity than anything else.

  • “No, that was just fireworks.” When asked if the toot she had signaled a poo.
  • “No, Dad. I want it straight up!” When witnessing her Dad trying to dilute her juice with water.
  • “Mom, we have a root!” Upon seeing her infant brother turn his head to the side and open his mouth in classic baby rooting.
  • “It’s just a skidmark.” When asked if she just had a poo.

Dads – Slightly Less Fearful Than Cooties

Congratulations Dads! We are among the things that have fallen off the list of “Things Kids Fear”, according to a new study from Australia’s Queensland University of Technology.

The researcher’s best guess is that we Dads are becoming more “reasonable” with our discipline techniques and not relying so much on more punitive measures, like corporal punishment for discipline.

I really don’t know how Dads from back then did it. The strict disciplinarian role seems so foreign to me. I mean, it would rip me up inside if I thought that The Girl was afraid of me, and it is inconceivable to me that I would ever hit my daughter.

So, score a point for today’s Dad, slightly less fearful than Dragon Pox and Dipsy-doodle-itis.

Olsen Twins Pitch Show About Healthy Eating

Hahahahahaha….I almost fell for this one.

Olsen Twins Pitch Show About Healthy Eating.

Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen are creating a show about health and nutrition for young children, according to media reports. Ashley and her twin sister Mary-Kate, who underwent rehab for anorexia in 2004, have met with TV executives about the new program aimed at four-to-five-year-olds called “Sportee Kids.”

Oh, wait…it’s true? Hmm, kinda like Tyra Banks hosting a show on how to be nice.